If someone were to ask you how you discern the voice of God, what would you say?

In order to know God’s guidance, we have to know His voice. We have to know what He cares about.

As we pray, we begin to wonder: how do I know if it’s God?

Knowing begins with the truths of scripture: God steadies us. He speaks life and peace. He encourages the coming of His kingdom, and the promotion of compassion, mercy, and justice. God amplifies voices of the marginalized, invites us to trust Him in the unseen, and speak up in wrongdoing. God draws near to the brokenhearted, and reminds us He is the one thing we need. God calls us out to places where we must depend on Him, and where His wisdom becomes the very thing we cling to.

As we come to know the Word of God, we begin to wonder how this applies to our own lives now. Many of us give up before we ever find out, but the vitality of our faith relies upon our knowing of God – of His voice, His heart, and His will. Slowly, as we seek Him earnestly, we come to know what God sounds like, and how His heart beats.

Is He calling me to this city, or that one? Is He calling me to go, or to stay? Is He calling me to move, or to wait? Should I pursue this relationship, or that one, or none at all?

The gift of discernment is the ability to distinguish between wisdom and folly. Through it, we’re able to understand and apply God’s Word, see things through His eyes, and develop insights that go far beyond what is seen and heard in the natural. We develop discernment by walking with the Good Shepherd, studying His Word, and meditating on it day and night.

In the abstract, this makes some sense. What about when the lines are a bit blurred? What about when His voice seems quiet? How do we know what to do then?

Many Faithful Options

Discernment is not always so easy when varying options seem “good”, or when we fear there is a “wrong” decision to make.

This is always where I’ve gotten stuck, and maybe you have too. In recent years, when I’ve hit crossroads for big life decisions, like moving to a new city or accepting a job, deciding what church I want to call home, etc I’ve grown paralyzed in the discerning process. I thought there was a wrong decision I could make, and I somehow had the potential of colossally messing up God’s plan for my life if I chose the wrong one. Have you ever been there?

Sometimes, the path is clear. But often, the moment calls for walking by faith not by sight.

God doesn’t stay quiet because He’s waiting for us to make the wrong move. He wants us to seek Him. He gives us room because God is not a puppeteer. He delights in our wholehearted pursuit, and our desires to do life with Him. While the church often teaches about calling as if there’s one title we are meant to hold in this life, the reality is, there are many assignments we can hold that please God and give Him glory. There is freedom to choose how we want to participate in the coming of God’s kingdom here on earth.

Many faithful options, I’ve been told. At times, this feels discouraging because we’re still left with questions. This or that, God?

What if He’s less of an either/or, and more of a both/and God?

At a crossroads, I’ve often prayed that God would just close a door and make it clear to me. Yet, the fruit comes when we rely on faith. Relinquishing my choice doesn’t always achieve that end, nor does it teach me how to trust the Lord in the unseen. By practicing discernment in the little things, we learn how to rely on God through life’s greater questions.

This still leaves us wondering: how?

In Philippians, Paul tells us to put on the mind of Christ. To adopt Jesus’ attitudes and thoughts. To say what he would say, and to act as he would act. Decision making isn’t black or white, but by learning the person of Jesus and spending time with him, we’re able to discover how he would show up in our circumstance. As we adopt the mind of Christ, we learn how to exercise our faith and trust in Him with all our heart, soul, mind and strength. This is why knowing the truths of scripture is the first step. We know God because we know the person of Jesus; our discernment will always begin there.

What if we have the knowledge; we just don’t know what to do with it?

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The Narrow Way

Someone asked me once how I know when God is calling me to something. I said two things.

The first was, usually it’s hard. The second was, I follow peace.

These aren’t hard and fast rules, but one thing is certain: God’s way is narrow, and those who find it are few. While God is not hard to find, His way can feel costly and difficult. Obedience asks something of us; it drew Jesus himself to death on a cross. Jesus asks us, too, to die to self, and surrender our preferences. To say not my will, but yours alone.

God’s way asks us to depend on Him, and grow in ruthless trust in the One who holds it all together. If our pursuit of comfort and safety trumps our desire to love and serve God, we may have lost sight of our shepherd. The invitation, then, is to return. To press in a littler harder. To surrender what’s holding us back, and find true peace, joy and satisfaction in the Lord alone.

As you pray for wisdom, ask yourself: Does this feel like a no because it’s not right, or because I’m afraid?

Follow Peace

The second thing I said was that God leads me in peace. In Psalm 91, we are told that under the shadow of His wings we will find refuge. In Philippians 4, Paul writes that the peace of God transcends our human understanding, and guards our hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

Peace is a promise God keeps. It marks His presence in our lives in our hearts, our minds, and our bodies. Having intentionally crafted us as embodied souls, God can use our bodies to speak to us. When we pray for wisdom, the knots in our stomach or the indescribable ease that washes over us can help guide us. Yet, for many of us, this is the extent of our discernment. Do I have peace? Here, we must proceed with caution. Our thoughts are not His thoughts, nor are His ways our ways.

One of the most challenging insights I read last year was the idea that we sometimes mistake psychology for theology. Sometimes we feel the rattle in our bones, the butterflies in our heart, and the doubt in our minds and take them as a sign when they aren’t one. I have always relied on the question of peace, but have been so convicted in recent months because there’s more to it than that.

Scripture tells us to go and to stay. It tells us to act and to wait. It records God’s command to Moses, telling him to be still, and know that I am God, and chronicles God’s desire to have a willing servant, to which Isaiah shouts, here am I; send me. When we go looking for answers, we may rely on our own preferences, comforts, and fears more than we realize. That’s why we must search deeper than our own hearts, into the depths of the kingdom where Jesus reigns, not so we can simply make a decision that doesn’t cause our anxiety to go haywire, but so we can make a wise and faithful one.

Sometimes those nerves, or the ease within us, mean something. Other times, they’re our natural wirings creating noise along the way. When we pray, God helps us decide what to hold onto and what to let go of.

Feeling anxiety the day you propose doesn’t necessarily mean it’s the wrong decision.

Not feeling butterflies on a first date doesn’t necessarily mean they’re wrong for you.

Being afraid of taking a risk doesn’t necessarily mean you should play it safe.

Not being afraid doesn’t necessarily mean you should do it.

Not having your dream job yet doesn’t mean you’re on the wrong path.

Being bad at something doesn’t mean you’ll never figure it out.

A no right now doesn’t mean it always will be.

While there are times our bodily responses and discernment are in alignment, psychology and theology can conflict, too. When we come to the feet of Jesus, with open hands, entrusting Him with a yes or a no (and with faith and obedience to see it through), we can make sense of the puzzle pieces that lay before us.

With God’s help, we can make decisions that further His kingdom and fight for truth, justice, and mercy. Ones that bring peace and joy, and that draw us into greater reliance and trust.

Follow peace, but be mindful that sometimes the will of God comes in a way you wouldn’t expect. Sometimes it feels scary or illogical. Sometimes it feels hard or wrong because it costs you something. Other times, it feels hard or wrong because it is.

As you pray for wisdom, ask yourself: What asks me to depend more deeply on God? What exercises my faith and trust in Him?

What asks you to leave comfort behind and frees your hands up to cling to the cloak of Jesus?

This is the way; walk in it

Isaiah 30:21 says, Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, ‘This is the way; walk in it’. Here, we find God’s promise of guidance. Fear not the threat of being led astray; a heart surrendered always has a lamp unto its feet. What I have found so freeing about this scripture is that whether we turn to the left or to the right, God will be with us.

So often, we just want to hear the audible voice of God tell us exactly what we should do. Sometimes, God’s grace goes before us like this with an open or closed door. Often, it doesn’t. What He gives us instead is a far greater gift: whispers of truth and encouragement that strengthen our faith to walk boldly and confidently toward one faithful option.

God is much less concerned with our yes’s and no’s, and much more preoccupied with the matters of our heart. He wants to transform us from the inside out, not just simply have us do something for Him. As we go about our decisions, we would be wise to search our own hearts, too. Is selfish ambition, pride, or deceit informing us? What about humility, compassion, and service? Are we shrinking away from something in fear, or going forth with boldness of faith? There lies the lesson, and the invitation.

Who are you becoming if you give this your yes?

If something grows you more into a person of love, it’s probably a good decision. If, either way, you are challenged to trust God in faith, then there may not be a wrong choice. The hard part is making a decision confidently without hearing or seeing God clearly. As we throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles us, we come to see a Father – in perfect love – casting out fear and delighting in us, even as we stumble and fall.

With Jesus, we’re invited into a journey. Life and its many turns is meant to sharpen us, and make us more like him. It’s meant to teach us how to endure in long-suffering. To learn God’s way, and walk in it. To delight in the beauty of the Lord, and choose Him above all our other loves. We’re invited to walk the narrow way, where there remains many faithful options.

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It’s a beautiful thing (if we let it be) to sit in the tension of seeking but not yet finding. To not know for certain, but to have faith in the One who will catch us if we fall. Taking a risk and stepping through doors we believe God has opened is a wonderful use of our free will.

Wrestle with God. Ask, seek and knock.

As you do, know that discernment is not just about knowing what decision to make, but trusting God amidst the uncertainty.

Don’t grow weary in your wondering. The Father is with you.